Joy Part II

I'm that person who never forgets, and never lets go.

Unforgiving

Relentless

When others have forgiven and forgotten, I'm still blaming myself, over and over and over, for the mistakes I've made.

It took me a long time to realize how incredibly destructive and ungodly this is. But I finally had a breakthrough moment, and wrote:

'Guilt does not come from God. God sends us conviction, which leads to change, not a broken record that bogs us down with painful memories and pointless regrets.' 

Yes, sometimes I am an incredibly dense and utterly blind Christian. There are so many elementary concepts that I haven't even begun to work out yet. Maybe I'll have time someday to learn deep and advanced spiritual truths. In the meantime, I'm kept quite busy trying to remember simple things like Guilt = Very much not good.

There is a reason why Satan is called the Accuser. It's incredibly difficult to stop listening to his accusations and reminders of my past faults. I've been tuning in and playing along with him for so many years that guilt has really become an almost unconscious habit.

Breaking that habit requires discernment and tenacity and energy, but God is reminding me of how much more joyful I will be when I'm finally able to leave guilt behind and live in my freedom as His loved and forgiven child.

It's going to be amazing!